Law Enforcement roundup

Our small town newspaper has the daily law enforcement round up. It is usually about the police telling the local teens to go somewhere else, but today's issue had 3 items of note.

1) "Flathead County sheriff's deputies recovered a gun stolen 23 years ago in Missoula. It was purchased by an unsuspecting buyer at the Kalispell gun show earlier this month. To play it safe, the man who purchased the gun called deputies and asked them to check the serial number. It came back as stolen, and the man was forced to turn it over to the authorities. He is only 20 years old , and thus not a suspect in the theft, investigators said"

I don't even know what to say about this. How does an investigator say that with a straight face?

2) "Deputies broke up a fight between two men, both set on possessing the same item recovered from the Columbia Falls dump."

Yet another place we can all go shopping, but hold on to your purse.

3) "Pink binoculars were stolen from an unlocked car on Kokanee Bend, the seventh reported theft from an unlocked vehicle on that road in the past four days. Deputies would like to remind the residents of Flathead County to lock their cars and take valuable items with them."

First of all, Duhhhhhh and second, who in the heck reports that your pink binoculars are stolen? Do the police really have nothing better to do then fill out a police report about your pink binoculars? (Then again, maybe they don't.)

Which brings me to point out the difference between people raised in a small town and big town.

Me: I have locked myself out of my truck at least twice in the nine years I have owned it (one of the times I was all dressed up for a wedding, wearing flip-flops and it was starting to rain, but I digress) in my knowledge that cars must be locked.

Mr. M: I once could not find the keys to my truck, after having looked for them in vain, I took the spares. I found my truck unlocked and the keys in the ignition! Now Mr. M states that he just forgot about them and I believe him, but it just demonstrates the intrinsic difference between us. There is no way I could just forget about it. I was raised in too large of a city.